TF2: A Diminutive Problem: End

The door flew open, banging off the wall behind it, and Scout stormed into the room. "Where's my -"

Oh dear god.

It smelled like someone had bought a cow, killed it, left it to rot for three weeks, shoved it into a dead buffalo, then left it to rot for another three weeks before dumping it in Heavy's room.

The 'dead buffalo' the smell was coming from was the pale Heavy on the bed, hidden away under the covers, a river of green goo running from his nose, red rimmed eyes, and a bed sheet in one hand for use as a hanky.

A loud rumble came from the Heavy, and the edge of his covers flapped, releasing more of the 'dead animal' gas.

Scout gagged and pinched his nose. No way Heavy had his pet, he couldn't even move let alone smash a tank and steal the baby.

"Told you to stay away, little man." he rumbled, before coughing into the spare bed sheet. "Doctor say I have flu. Very…" he waved the hanky, snot running down it as he searched for the word, "catchy. You should go. Need to rest now."

"Yeah yeah, sure man, get bettah soon, need someone at watch my back out dere." Scout backed up, closing the door as he escaped from the sick man's room and inhaling clean air in loud gasps.

"Sweet jesus." he coughed.

Who next? Sniper? Nah, he never left his room anyway (actually he did, and he was sure he'd spotted him sneaking into Spy's room a couple of times, but that wasn't the important thing right now). Maybe Pyro would know!

---

"Py! Py man, c'mon open up!" Scout's fist pounded against the door, almost shaking it from its frame. "MUMBLES! OPEN THE FUCK UP!"

The door swung open and Pyro stood there - Scout could swear that gasmask was glaring at him man, seriously - with something on his head. Engineer's glove.

"…Dude what the fuck's on your head?"

Pyro shrugged. He said he felt like putting it there, what's the big deal?

"Nuthin' man, nuthin'. Hey, you seen like…a baby squid thing?"

Baby squid? Pyro shook his head, and Scout swore he saw the mask move into a confused expression. Creepy man.

"Nevah mind why. Doesn't mattah anyway. See ya Mumbles." Scout waved and stalked off, hands shoved in his pockets. Damnit who had it?!

Pyro shut the door and reached up to take the glove off, revealing the hidden sleeping tentaspy. He'd give it back tonight, he had to finish rebuilding the tank first. It wasn't his fault he'd knocked it over.

He set the baby down in a large glass of water and watched it bob around tiredly for a little before going back to gluing the panes of glass together.

---

Scout had looked everywhere, and was returning to his room in a sorry state. Sniper had almost cut off his head, thinking him a spy for asking such a ridiculous question and he'd fled with his life and throat barely intact. Nothing improved after that, Soldier almost broke his arm and Demo tried to get him drunk. Engie had thrown him out in a rage after he knocked something over and broke it.

Now he was going back to his room  - and damnit he was NOT crying, get stuffed! He shoved open the door and slammed it shut, throwing himself down on the bed. Notcryingnotcryingnotcrying - what the hell was that noise? He didn't sound like that when he was cry - I mean, had something in his eye - did he? He lifted his head and looked around the room.

He couldn't understand what he saw.

The broken glass from earlier had gone, replaced by a new tank, bigger than the last one and with a filter this time. Right in the centre of it squeaking worriedly from behind the glass was his beloved baby tentaspy.

A cry of utter joy escaped him - one he would later totally deny if anyone asked - and lifted the lid away to take out his baby and hold it close. It giggled and playfully covered his cheek in tentacle slime. He didn't care, he was too happy to have Tentaspy back where he belonged.

---

Outside the door, Pyro heaved a sigh of relief at the joyous cry form inside. He loved happy endings. A smile on his face beneath the mask, Pyro wandered off into the night, Engineer's glove still perched upon his head.